It finally happened! My hCG levels finally reached zero! It didn't take as long as I expected but it feels good knowing that now all we do is wait. No appointments, no medication, no calling every week to find out results. Simply NOT get pregnant and go once a month for a blood draw. Three months from now we should get the approval to start trying again. Until then, we just breathe and trust that God is working His plan through all of this.
Another exciting thing to note, I got a call from the specialist recently. He called after he spent some time looking over my chart and wanted to let me know what he saw. He said that my body responds well to the Clomid and he would like me to continue that route when we start trying again. He also said that he sees no reason why we won't get pregnant and why we would have another miscarriage. It was great to know that after the three months of waiting, our odds are pretty good that things will turn out a lot better than they have been.
It's a good feeling to have the last few months behind us. It's exciting to go into 2013 knowing that we are starting fresh. Knowing that we are healed, healthy, and that the odds are in our favor for a healthy pregnancy is a great feeling.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Friday, December 14, 2012
Sleepless night...
Last night was one of the worst nights sleep I've had in a long time. I laid awake stressing and praying about the outcome of my doctor appointment today. A year ago when we started on this journey to start a family we never dreamed we would be up against so much.
This past week has been stressful. We got word that my hCG levels were starting to rise (never a good thing unless I'm pregnant). Because there's no chance I'm pregnant, we were told there was a risk of having an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy. I had to wait to find out more until I saw my doctor until today. The last 24 hours were some of the hardest moments of my life. I dreaded and feared the worst. I kept imagining I'd get news that it WAS an ectopic pregnancy and that my Fallopian tube would have to be removed.
Thankfully, I got better news than I ever anticipated. It is NOT a tubal pregnancy. My doctor believes that there was leftover tissue from my last D&C that started to grow back which caused my hCG levels to slowly rise again. He doesn't think surgery is necessary because of how low my levels are. In order to stop the tissue from growing, I had to get two injections to stop the cell growth. I am beyond relieved that my tubes will stay in tact!
The only bad news I left with today is that we will have to wait longer to start trying for a baby again. We will continue to monitor my hCG levels until they reach zero. Once that happens, they will have to stay there for 3 months before we can start trying. I know waiting that time is the best thing for myself, Matt, and our future baby. But waiting is definitely a challenge.
I am grateful that people knew how to pray for me over the last few days. I was feeling discouraged and so frustrated. But I'm feeling better and more optimistic because of the prayers and support from so many.
This past week has been stressful. We got word that my hCG levels were starting to rise (never a good thing unless I'm pregnant). Because there's no chance I'm pregnant, we were told there was a risk of having an ectopic (tubal) pregnancy. I had to wait to find out more until I saw my doctor until today. The last 24 hours were some of the hardest moments of my life. I dreaded and feared the worst. I kept imagining I'd get news that it WAS an ectopic pregnancy and that my Fallopian tube would have to be removed.
Thankfully, I got better news than I ever anticipated. It is NOT a tubal pregnancy. My doctor believes that there was leftover tissue from my last D&C that started to grow back which caused my hCG levels to slowly rise again. He doesn't think surgery is necessary because of how low my levels are. In order to stop the tissue from growing, I had to get two injections to stop the cell growth. I am beyond relieved that my tubes will stay in tact!
The only bad news I left with today is that we will have to wait longer to start trying for a baby again. We will continue to monitor my hCG levels until they reach zero. Once that happens, they will have to stay there for 3 months before we can start trying. I know waiting that time is the best thing for myself, Matt, and our future baby. But waiting is definitely a challenge.
I am grateful that people knew how to pray for me over the last few days. I was feeling discouraged and so frustrated. But I'm feeling better and more optimistic because of the prayers and support from so many.
Friday, December 7, 2012
We finally have SOME answers!
Last week, Matt and I met with the specialist. After a LONG time answering questions, we left with a lab slip for blood work to be done and very little clarity. We did get some good news while at that appointment. First, the doctor told us he didn't see any reason why we couldn't get pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy. He even mentioned that we might not need his help to do so. Great news, yes, but didn't explain WHY we had two miscarriages. Second, he told us that since I am not "infertile" (since we can get pregnant) it is likely that insurance will cover our visits with him. And lastly, we don't have to wait an extended period of time to start trying again. My current hCG levels are at 100 but once they drop below 2, we have been given the "ok" to start trying. Overall, it was a good appointment. We felt hopeful and excited, yet still nervous that we could have another miscarriage.
After almost a week of waiting for my blood work results, and after several phone calls on my end, I finally heard from the doctor. He said my lab results came back "somewhat normal." He said I have what is called the MTHFR homozygote which is believed to cause miscarriages. From what I understand from the research I have done, this causes blood clotting which prevents vital development early in pregnancy. So what do we do? This is the exciting part...I take a total of 6 prescribed vitamins everyday (4 different kinds). I am on Prenatal Vitamins, Folic Acid, B12, and B6. It is his hope that these vitamins will help with my deficiencies and lead us to a healthy pregnancy.
I never thought I would be so excited that there IS something wrong with me. It would have been great if nothing was found but, it would have left us nervous to start trying again. With this diagnosis, I feel like we can move forward with so much more confidence that our next pregnancy will be a healthy one. It's amazing the amount of weight that has been lifted off my shoulders. I haven't been this relieved and relaxed since September. I feel like I am sleeping better, remembering things better, and all around happier just because we know how to proceed with all of this.
I am still heartbroken over the loss of our two babies. Not a day goes by that I don't think of them and this difficult time that we have had to face. But I am so incredibly faithful that God is working His hand in all of this. He knows exactly what is in store for us. And of course, HIS plan is always so much better than what we imagined for ourselves!
After almost a week of waiting for my blood work results, and after several phone calls on my end, I finally heard from the doctor. He said my lab results came back "somewhat normal." He said I have what is called the MTHFR homozygote which is believed to cause miscarriages. From what I understand from the research I have done, this causes blood clotting which prevents vital development early in pregnancy. So what do we do? This is the exciting part...I take a total of 6 prescribed vitamins everyday (4 different kinds). I am on Prenatal Vitamins, Folic Acid, B12, and B6. It is his hope that these vitamins will help with my deficiencies and lead us to a healthy pregnancy.
I never thought I would be so excited that there IS something wrong with me. It would have been great if nothing was found but, it would have left us nervous to start trying again. With this diagnosis, I feel like we can move forward with so much more confidence that our next pregnancy will be a healthy one. It's amazing the amount of weight that has been lifted off my shoulders. I haven't been this relieved and relaxed since September. I feel like I am sleeping better, remembering things better, and all around happier just because we know how to proceed with all of this.
I am still heartbroken over the loss of our two babies. Not a day goes by that I don't think of them and this difficult time that we have had to face. But I am so incredibly faithful that God is working His hand in all of this. He knows exactly what is in store for us. And of course, HIS plan is always so much better than what we imagined for ourselves!
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